I have been fighting depression for a few years now, in the beginning it was really hard I sometimes wondered how I would get through to the next day, and now two years later it is difficult trying to be in the place where the depression no longer can survive but still I find it lurking, chewing away at the progress I make as if it doesn't want me to let it go. Maybe I am it's support blanket? Maybe it needs me to survive and if I beat this and it dies will that be so bad?
I've described my depression like the black smoke you get on television, it can be shoved into something really small but when it wants to grow it can and does!
I have been off my medication for a few months now and I've been through some tough times and yes I have managed them and come out again on the other side. Its been tough, its hard on my family I feel guilty about that, parents that don't understand depression and have the old values of "pull yourself together and just get on with life" if only it was that easy!
Some days I feel as good if not better than I have felt in many years but there are still days were I struggle to get out of bed and do some of the basic things associated with modern living.
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